I want to talk about what it means to be a young, ambitious mother.
Motherhood is not something I like to talk about on my blog but being that I have a lot of moms who follow me, I figured we could all learn from each other. First things first, being a mom is amazing! I can honestly say I never imagined I’d be in this situation. I mean, I always knew I wanted to be a mom, but I never realized I’d love someone as much as a I love my daughter.
When she was born, I feel like I entered into a new world. Like I became a new woman. I’ve always been an ambitious woman, something I’ve prided myself on. But now that I have a tiny human depending me, I want to go harder than ever. For me, that is why right now I only want one child. So I can be successful for both her and myself. It might sound selfish, but wouldn’t it be worse if I had more kids and didn’t give them my all? The kind of job I have is already demanding, so its hard for me to spend a lot of time with Luna as it is.
You either get criticized for being young with a child, criticized for not having any, or criticized for having too many. Women can’t win. They even criticize you for not being at home. I have big goals that I intend to achieve.
I used to dream of having two kids, but when you’re a young, full-time working woman, it’s hard to have it all. This world isn’t built for strong women, especially not for women of color. Moving up the career ladder is already hard enough, add having to be a parent full-time and now you’re struggling with the balance of life.
But I wouldn’t give up being a mother for anything. And I don’t look down on those women who have more than one child at a young age. We as young women should have the freedom to choose what we want to do with our lives. I’m young and have a lot ahead of me. Gone are the traditions of having a house full of kids and being a stay at home mom. We are working mothers no matter how many kids we have.
Now millennials are on the go, so if that means working full-time, jumping from job to job until you find the right one, or just taking your kids along for the ride of your success and theirs, then so be it. I’m a working woman trying to make it to the top. And I need to take advantage of my age. Millennials hop from job to job because we see opportunity. We don’t settle for anything less than we think we deserve.
I still have time to be what I want, all the while helping my little one be what she wants. Being a young mother has opened up new doors: you have your career and your family life, while still being able to enjoy your 20s. You also see the world differently because not only are you depending on you, but someone who can’t fend for themselves is too.
Believe me when I say mom-shaming runs deeper than criticism. Millennial women have different takes on what they want that sometimes we look at each other with critical eyes. I love seeing all the moms on my timeline being great mothers and working hard. If you watched my Making a Millennialvideo, then you’d know the criticisms I have faced as a young mom. And no, we aren’t teen moms, but we are still in our 20s and 20 somethings are perceived to be the ones who should be living life to the fullest. But that can mean something different to so many people. Don’t let someone tell you, you are doing it wrong.
If you are living the way you want, then to me, you are living life to the fullest. Having a group of young, strong mothers to watch and learn from is inspiring. That’s why I wanted to write this post. I want to inspire those who feel like the world is against them. Just remember, don’t get caught up in social media. Other people’s lives might look good, but social media and reality are very different entities.
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